“You always hated
Your dark brown eyes
And I never understood why.
You said they lacked depth,
Like there was no ocean
To get lost in, but
Every time I looked
Into them I felt myself
Drowning.”—I’m still drowning in you (via mistakenharmony)
“I always come back to you. You know what? I don’t fuckin care if they think I am mad. I have so many reasons to be crazy. These reasons are valid. See? This is why I don’t drink with ‘friends’ anymore. I know at the end of the night, I’ll see my body fold itself into nothingness like a clam that’s too afraid of the waves. I’ll break down. Then I’ll hear them say, “here we go again.” I pretend I don’t hear them say that. My hands are light and shaking. My mouth is dry and spicy. In my head, I say fuck this people. Fuck this drink. Fuck this night. Yes here we go again because this insane longing is crawling in my veins like razorblades. I can’t deny the presence of this familiar sadness that demands to be felt every now and then. I drink to be brave. So I could say your name and pretend I didn’t. To make them believe they are the one hallucinating, to make them believe they are hearing things they are not supposed to hear. They are crazy and me? I’m just sad. But I’m the most normal person you could bump into in this little space of awkwardness they call ‘bar’. If I’m being honest, this is the most sober I could be. This is the time when my head is the clearest and the wildest. I love my thoughts. They don’t require burning. My hands are trembling but so does this earth yet nobody notices. My eyes are overspilling with water and water is good. I am not happy but does it mean I won’t be? I may be lonely now but aren’t we all? You’re just good at hiding it. So I’d rather be in this fuckin floor right now with my messy hair and sentiments. I’d rather wake up tomorrow in another friend’s house and think of ways to apologize without sounding desperate and pitiful. I’ll go home and I swear to god, I wish you’re there holding my back while I throw up. There’s always honey water. There’s always my feet. There’s forgetting. I always come back to you. But I’m almost there.”—irishjulienne, almost sober (via talkingoutsoft)
“I believe in fate
and fate believes in me.
we will meet again.
You’ll be standing there
and I’ll be standing here, still.
And all the time in between
of waiting and wondering
will all start to make sense.”—
“Someday, someone is going to look at you with a light in their eyes you’ve never seen, they’ll look at you like you’re everything they’ve been looking for their entire lives. Wait for it.”—(via suspend)
“Don’t be jealous of anyone. I guarantee you, if everyone walked into a room, and dumped their problems onto the floor, when they saw what everyone else’s problems were, they’d be scrambling to get their own problems back before someone else got to them first.”—Kim Gruenenfelder, A Total Waste of Makeup (via quotethat)
“You have this one life. How do you wanna spend it? Apologizing? Regretting? Questioning? Hating yourself? Dieting? Running after people who don’t see you? Be brave. Believe in yourself. Do what feels good. Take risks. You have this one life. Make yourself proud.”—(via brntsienna)